Most mornings, it’s a 6:00am wakeup. That’s followed by a “Holy FUCK!” And then it’s off to the shower. I hookup my phone to the lil stereo I have in the bathroom & BLAST Kanye West’s “Power.” Let the calf raises begin! I never know how many I end up doing. But it’s alot. “Roots” (legs) like these don’t grow on trees!! I love the mornings. Even when hungover, the sun hitting my face through the bedroom window feels refreshing. Alot of you folks take waking up for granted. It doesn’t happen for everybody! Enjoy that shit & be thankful. So…. this post will be kinda short. I’m waiting of Eva to finish Hapkido practice. So I’ve got an hour to kill.
I was talking to an old friend the other day. It was a conversation that brought up the good, bad & ugly within our lives; Our friendship as well. It was good. I needed it. I was reminded that despite my flaws & moral compass being outta whack on occasion, I bring more “good” to the world than not. It also reminded us of how old we are. Good thing we were able to fill-in one another’s memory gaps. I don’t know if it’s the marijuana, indifference or early Alzheimer’s, but I’m not bragging about having a memory like an elephant as much as I used to. For the sake of “personal growth,” I’ll just chock it up to “letting go of unimportant things of no consequence.”
During this conversation, health, personal relationships, politics & religion came up. All of which are topics difficult to discuss for anyone. Those of you that know me, know that I’m NOT religious. However, my friend is. And hearing the trials & tribulations they’ve been through, broke my heart. I FUCKING CRIED! “What’s this salty discharge?” (Seinfeld reference) Their faith on the other hand, remained unshaken. I marvel at that. How does one stay faithful to a “God,” that causes them so much pain? I couldn’t do it after December 31, 1995. And I sure as hell couldn’t do it now, being an adult. After we hung up, I recalled a random bar conversation I had with someone. I was asked something along the lines of “What do you believe in?” FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK….
What I believe is that WE, are our own “God.” And for those of you who are religious, bear with me a moment. Or just look at it this way: If we are built in “His” image, wouldn’t it make sense that we’re “Godlike” beings? And if we are to be “Godlike,” wouldn’t it make sense that we be in control of the one thing we have, that no one can stake claim to….Our own lives? Every day, we make decisions for ourselves. Every day, we put ourselves in various situations & predicaments. WE make the decisions “to do,” or “not to do.” No one else does. I believe putting blind faith into something intangible, is a waste of time & effort. Especially, when that faith could be placed within ourselves, to accomplish what we thought was impossible.
Do you have a “Godlike” hold onto your life? Or are you the perpetual “victim,” that allows life to trample them?