Where did the summer go? Today is the first day of school out here & the town is dead- Or at least being overrun by those close to death. Senior citizens were out in droves today! It’s as if they were exiled from their assisted living homes. Eva seemed really excited about being back in school. I’m pretty damn excited to have her back on some sort of schedule. It was getting annoying allowing her to sleep past 9-10am this summer. She’s a “morning person,” like me. But not if she doesn’t have to be!
This seemingly overwhelming feeling of “not belonging” has plagued me today. Maybe it’s the allergy medication that has me “loopy?” Perhaps it’s having Eva away from me in consecutive days? Could it be “end of summer blues,” so I naturally hibernate? I’m not sure. I just don’t feel as though I belong anywhere in particular here. I have friends/acquaintances/co-workers & what-not. But I AM NOT “one of these people”; Homegrown & products of nepotism. My family background & experiences are just different. And quite frankly, I’m Black. That in itself, makes me “different” than most out here. Nearly 3 years of paying property taxes & patronizing businesses & I still get weird looks, or have awkward interactions with service industry folks. Let me say this to the assholes of the service industry: If I want my order of wings “extra-extra” crispy, you bet your ass that’s what I better receive. I don’t care what your opinion is of MY preference. As I’m writing this, I think this is truly one of the few times I’ve felt like a minority while in the U.S. Fucking small town!!!
My dumbass really tied one on tonight. I’m currently drunk, in bed & just realized I don’t remember the drive home. I’m gonna hate myself when that alarm goes off in 5 hours.
Hungover, exhausted, thirsty (for water), & at work. It’s dead here at the massage studio & in the background on my phone, is an ESPN podcast. I’ve got my water, Mt. Dew & a comfy chair now. Just finished folding linen & looking at the schedule again, nothing has changed. First appointment of the day will be arriving as I’m leaving at 4pm. Thank goodness. I don’t feel like dealing with too many people today. Given how my allergies are kicking my ass, I’d rather use my mouth to breathe instead of talking.
Quick story: I saw some “Quat Tabs” while at the brewery the other day. They’re used in the sanitation process of the brew tanks. Apparently, and even advertised on the label, it kills the HIV VIRUS! That’s always a plus right? But if we can create a tablet that can kill HIV, clone animals, draw/write shopping lists on refrigerator screens, arm a UAV with enough munitions to take out the New England states & still keep up with the Kardashians…. Why can’t we create ONE allergy medication that fucking works?
This is the weekend of the “Rod Run” out here on the peninsula. Earlier in the week, I heard someone refer to it as: “Old men having foot spasms in old vehicles….Vroom-Vroom-Vroom!” I couldn’t agree more at the moment. These guys & their majestically painted hot-rods, that are LOUD FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN ATTENTION, are not helping my headache.
Woke up this morning, stiff throughout my neck & shoulders. This weather change has my body going bonkers; Alcohol consumption too. Limbs are throbbing & I feel lethargic. Perfect excuse to have a “lazy” day & enjoy college football on the couch….
Checked my calendar today. Turns out, I was due to give myself a Humira injection yesterday. Just another reason my body is throbbing. I feel like a dumbass. I remember alot of the dumb shit that doesn’t matter. While forgetting the important shit, more often than I’d like to admit. Namely, taking my medication. Although, it’s been tougher since the frequency change- From every other Thursday, to every 10 days. Good thing tomorrow is what I call “Maintenance Monday.” A day in which I cook/prep meals for the first half of the week, meditate, stretch, nap & make a concerted effort to “heal” myself. As for today’s agenda…. SEASON 5 FINALE OF “POWER.”
Just watched the season 5 finale of Power. Goddamn! Sometimes, you can be too smart for your own good.
And to conclude the evening… “Apocalypto.” Another good movie. Grotesquely graphic… But a good story nonetheless.
Currently what’s brewing, is a turkey and black bean chili. The chili will then be spread over tortilla chips & drizzled with an amazing cheese (Kerrygold Dubliner). I’m sure some may be wondering about the “vegetarian thing.” I’m not built for it yet. Eva has more discipline than me, in the food department. But even she gave me the “ok” when she heard my plans for this amazing chili/nachos! “Maintenance Monday” has started without a hitch. The sun has been teasing me to come out & play. But that wind is visibly brutal & not something I’m trying to battle today.
Tonight is also the start of Eva’s contemporary dance class. I tried to convince her that cross-country would be a fitting extracurricular activity. However, it interferes with dance, hapkido, drama club & every other part of her schedule. Not a battle I could ever imagine winning. As a parent, it can sometimes be annoying when your kids make decisions for themselves, that don’t align with yours. It’s also an awesome sight, when they fearlessly stand their ground, state their case & accept the repercussions of said decisions.
On this day 17 years ago, I awakened in my Texas apartment at 4:30am. I was showered & out the door by 5:15am. And by 5:30am, I was 15 minutes earlier than the prescribed 15 minutes early (5:45am). That day was either a battalion or division run of 20 miles to celebrate picking up the DRB Status (Deployment Readiness Brigade). All that meant was: If some shit popped off, we would be in the 1st group of deployments.
The run goes perfectly. No one keeled over puking or dying; My body felt great; And it was a breezy 70 degrees on Ft. Hood- “The Great Place.” I return home to shower & am instantly tackled by a 20 month old Izabella.
I miss those days with her…. She looked at me differently.
I peel her from my legs and hit the shower. Ten minutes later, the uniform is on, looking “crispy” & highly creased. I exit the bedroom to see that Izabella has sloppily poured us both a bowl of Lucky Charms. I go to the kitchen, grab the apple juice, a glass & the Tweety Bird sippy-cup. We decided that the best place to be, was in the living room, in front of the television, watching “PB & J. Otter”…. A very underrated Disney cartoon. It encouraged kids to use their “noodle”/brain, when trying to solve a problem of any sort. The characters would place their index fingers on the temples and dance around in a circle. After about 2 spins, I’d play like I was too dizzy to use my noodle. At which time, Izabella would try to save me from falling.
Noodle dance executed & breakfast finished, I kiss the kid & wife & hit the road. In the CD player was Method Man & Redman’s, “Blackout Album.” Pulling into work (C-Btry 4-42FA), I’m greeted at my car door by “A.B.” He asked, “Have you seen what the fuck is happening?” He directs me to the First Sergeant’s office,where there are nearly 70 men piled in, gathered around a television…. Watching the same shit you were: Planes crashing into buildings.
What is your most profound memory of that day? I remember at some point around 8:30am thinking, “This is gonna be a perfect day.”